And so we have it. Another week closer to my separation from my day job. I have not made that announcement official yet. No one at my employer knows of my intentions…yet. I will not let the cat out of the bag until we get within two weeks of the day I want to cut ties forever. This is the only way to make my plans work. There is always a back story:
We came back to New Jersey and I took the first job offer that came across. What a big mistake. First of all, we should have stayed where we were. But due to a lack of commitment within our household, I made the decision to bring everyone back. And that was a mistake. I own it. I did it in the interest of appeasing the members of our household who were miserable where we went.
I still can’t get my arms around why there was a disconnect. We planned on doing this for years. We were in a decent position to make it happen, yet when we did it the commitment wasn’t there. We had too many opportunities to call it off before even going out there. But I didn’t get the right answers when I asked the same question repeatedly: “are you sure?”
I left a job that I was at for 19 years. I had seniority and a six minute commute. And we left it because there was something better 4,200 miles away. An opportunity to make a difference in our lives and to deal with all of the issues we had with the East Coast. We had the best of intentions, but still couldn’t pull it off.
And so we are here now. After ten months of torture, I am pulling the plug. I need to get away. I need to gain all the time I don’t have during the day because I am going through the motions at this job to forge a new path. To boldly go where I have not gone before. To walk in the direction of my dreams.
And so we are once again at the fork in the road. If we go left, there is much work to do in order to build a career as a freelancer. If we go right…well it is either staying where we are or working for another company. I need to try going left. I need to see if this is really for me. But I can’t as long as I have to go into an office and work for someone else.
There are many opportunities out there. I just need to land the one or two that will open the door. As I always say: it is always harder to break in. The first opportunity is the toughest one to secure. But once you do, there is nowhere to go but up. I am excited about this time. I am ready to take the reigns and give this 100% of my time, effort and energy. I am going to make it happen!